Wow

It sure has been a long time since I last wrote! I mean, I’ve been known to take my writing respites, but I don’t know if I’ve ever exceeded a month before.

I’ve sort of had a lot going on, both good and bad, that I don’t feel ready to address in the blogosphere just yet.

I did want to post a poem, though, in case anyone had any serious criticisms for me. I don’t really like the poem so far because I think it’s rather cliched… but I see a lot of potential in it. I also really like the last line and, for that reason alone, I’d like to keep working on it. Here it is:

as the years of your life wear thinner

and the month of May is an instant

and the winter is still longer than the summer,

occasionally, when the winter of your heart rears in summer,

you must clasp it, warming the vesicles,

smoothing your palms over its surface,

without care for the blood that will stain your hands.

and the words of your father will ring in your ears as you console yourself,

or the wisdom imparted to you through the teachers, the priests, the wretched and destitute,

through your enemies and your elders,

they will be the assuagement through which you are salvaged.

It’s as yet untitled. I dunno, I’m going to keep working on it to see if I can tune it up a bit. I think, mainly, I need to improve the diction. Any suggestions would be absolutely adored.

Epiphany

I just now realized why people like to take macro shots of flowers. It’s because they look like tiny alien creatures, much more beautiful than we could ever hope to be.

When we see them close up, the veins that run through their petals, the textures that are reminiscent of skin, the bright faces, each one unique – we note similarities between us mammals and these flora that we might otherwise overlook. Still, the differences between us probably outnumber the similarities, and we are fascinated by them. They are as still as anything inorganic or deceased, but they somehow retain a vibrancy in shape and color that can only be found among living things.

Seeing macros of these pretty little things reminds us of just how strange they are, both because they are foreign to us, and because they are more like us than we expect.

More Pictures

Well, I finally got a couple of decent flower shots. I also continued my little cigarette series with a picture of my mother’s hand holding one. She has rather nice hands, so I thought it made for a nice picture (even though I don’t approve your habit, Mom!)

Overexposed, but I like it.

DrukQs

This album may be old news to some of you, but I’ve been listening to it a lot recently, and felt the need to write about it.

DrukQs is an album by electronic musician Aphex Twin. It is, in my estimation, his most interesting work. The double album contains several tracks with smooth textures and frenetic beats, but these are interspersed with some lovely pieces for prepared piano. These pieces are very reminiscent of the impressionists of the late 19th and early 20th centuries.

My friend Jes burned this album for me, thinking that I might appreciate it. I remember listening to it on my way home from her place in rural New England, wondering why anyone would make such a rambling album seemingly made up only of noises and self-indulgent electronic beats. I do, however, remember being quite freaked out by the haunting track “Gwely Mernans,” a track with a deafening, pulsating beat underneath a pitch-bending, echoed piano. Driving home on an empty road, surrounded by nothing but darkness and hanging trees is nothing short of frightening.

I listened to it a few times, and I enjoyed it, but only superficially. I put it away, and forgot about it almost entirely. I don’t remember much about the circumstances through which I came to revisit it, but, with each listening, I came to love it and appreciate its complexity more and more.

It is a strange album, and it won’t appeal to everyone. I submit to you, for your enjoyment or abhorrence, a few of my favorite tracks that are available on youtube:

First, here is my current favorite piano piece. It is the perfect soundtrack to a dreary, rainy day.

Here is one of my favorite frenetic tracks.

Here is a piece that I absolutely adore, played on what sounds like a carillon (although I suspect it’s actually a computer).

Bonus track! This piece is played on what sounds like a very, very prepared piano.

If you have any interest in these tracks whatsoever, I suggest that you get the album, totally neglect it for 6 months, and then revisit it whenever you feel the urge. You might find yourself surprisingly in love with it several years down the line.

Yet More Pictures

Things in my life are progressing faster than I could have predicted, and I feel as if I have very little control over the analogous ebb and flow. I’ll tell you what I mean when things are definite.

I took some pictures last night and today. They’re not especially exciting, but I’ll post them just the same.

First, the Cigarette Series:

I decided to take a series of pictures of my father's cancer sticks.

An attempt to get the logo in there.

I like the perspective on this one.

This one is similar, but I edited it to decrease the yellow lighting just a bit.

I wanted to take Buddha's picture, but Dad insisted on sticking his cigarette in the middle of my shot.

Okay, now onto a few nature shots. We took a walk today, and photographed an old railroad track that is now a bike trail:

All my flower pictures are, to varying degrees, blurry. I softened the color saturation and the contrast on this one.

A view from the rail bridge.

Geese. As you can probably tell, I was quite far away when I took this picture. My 12x zoom is something special.

I was messing around with the aperture settings.

I’m learning, and it’s been a pleasure to walk around, taking pictures in the sunlight.

Bulleted Updates

- I am currently at work. My boss brought in a fruit cup for me. She always has something delicious for me.

- I’m going to have lunch with Jimmy today at our favorite breakfast place.

- I suppose that’s about it. I don’t have much going on at the moment.

Phun Continued

Here are some more pictures from today:

A little red cart.

This is the coolest former church ever. It was converted to a house, though now it belongs to a business. My dream is to live in a cool church.

Experimenting with perspective again.

I put my camera on the ground. I thought it looked sorta cool.

On the side of the church.

Stained glass.

Broken fence.

Ahhh! Totem Pole.

More Phun

It was a busy weekend. I ate a lot of good food, spent time with friends and family, and took some photos in Collinsville. I’ll post some of my favorites:

Flowers

Lady with a yellow skirt

Broken slate on the steps.

All we are is Flags in the wind, dude.

Cool, pointy fence.

I put my camera on the ground and got this lovely image.

I kept messing with perspective.

I’ll post more today or tomorrow. Taking pictures is such a great excuse to be outside.

Movies Yo

This weekend was absolutely excellent for me. After roughly a month of lying around, feeling gross and doing nothing, it was a welcome treat to merely be out of the house. In addition to that, this last weekend brought beautiful weather after all those weeks of rain, cold, and drear.

On Sunday, we went to see Drag Me To Hell, the latest flick from director Sam Raimi. You may know Raimi from the Spider-Man trilogy, but he also directed another, cult-ier series. I’m a pretty big Evil Dead fan, and I was excited to see the most recent of Raimi’s horror films. The previews looked pretty pitiful, but reviews from both critics and friends were consistently good.

We met our friend at a little movie theater about 20 or 30 minutes away. The drive was fairly scenic, and the theater itself was extremely cool. It was somewhat dilapidated, and it was hidden behind a large shopping center. It had an old-fashioned, broken-looking marquee above the entrance. Inside, the walls were painted a bright purple, and, aside from the cashiers, there wasn’t a soul in sight. There were a couple of arcade games that bespeckled a barren cafe. The theater itself had bright red walls, and the people already seated were oddly silent, despite that there was nothing on the screen or on the speakers.

The movie was hilarious. All of the fight scenes between the protagonist and her foe were very tongue-in-cheek. The movie didn’t have a lot of blood, though it still managed to be incredibly gross. It was suspenseful yet side-splitting. I loved it.

Conclusion: it was a fun weekend.

Music

Whenever I find myself with copious amounts of free time, I usually end up disappearing into a spree of music appreciation. In other words, when I get bored, my instinct is to spend lots of time listening thoughtfully to music I love, or music to which I’ve recently been introduced.

If I’m especially bored, and during my month of gallbladder pain and recovery from surgery I most certainly was, I start to make my own music. This usually just means trying to sing something a cappella and record it, or making songs using loops on my computer. It’s something that requires little more than a good voice, decent relative pitch, and the necessary software.

This time, I recorded myself doing a version of The Other Woman. It’s poorly recorded, and there are moments in it that make me cringe, but it was so fun to do that I’ve been sharing it through several internet venues just to say, “Hey, I did something.” For some reason, doing this has awakened a dream that I abandoned long, long ago – to start a band.

The closest I’ve come to actually starting a band was in 6th grade. My friend Justin and I, a bassist, recruited a few other members and called ourselves “Disclosure.” We didn’t even have one rehearsal, but we spent hours on the phone talking about what kind of music we liked, and how cool it would be to make our own music. It’s probably just as well that this particular dream never came to fruition, because I’m sure that we would have been positively awful.

When I was 16, my friend Matty (also a bassist!) and I mused about starting a band. This endeavor probably would have been slightly more musically successful had we actually followed through, but neither of us had the ambition. Instead we hung around and watched horror movies, played book and dice RPGs, and essentially allowed our tendency towards being nerds overshadow our desire to rock.

This time around, I lack a friend and bassist with whom to muse. On the other hand, though, I have a much larger and varied source of influences. I’ve been inexplicably obsessed with two genres: 1) the shoegaze movement of the early 90s and 2) trip hop. I think these two elements, with a smattering of all the other cool stuff I like, would make some very weird and possibly good music.

The problem is that I can’t write songs. Okay, I’ve never diligently tried to write songs. I have no faith in my music writing abilities, only in my ability to appreciate what’s great and what isn’t. One thing’s for sure, though – I’ve been dreaming about fronting a band for nearly all my life. My musical training took me in a vastly different direction, to the point where I’m not even sure if my voice will ever be suited to jazz/rock/trip hop whatever.

I’ve been casually perusing craigslist, just to see what kind of musicians inhabit my area. Most of them are only interested in covering 70s and 90s classics. Yuck. I need to find another bassist who shares my vision. And this time, we need to actually do something.

Edit: By the way, Michael, I still love Thriller.